Blowing Up at Myself

Nothing like having a hissy fit because your feelings were hurt or you didn't get heard. This is my story today. Didn't realize how much I had been storing inside my brain and body. Quite drinking coffee, stopped smoking cigarettes, cut back on smoking MJ( it's fucking genius really. I can't smoke MJ until I work out.), cut out beef and pork, refined sugars and, cut back on dairy. It's only been a couple of weeks( yeah, I fucking started before the holiday) or so but I haven't wavered once. However, I'm kind of a cunt because everything is heightened and I'm starting to run like a freight train. Anyhoo, I haven't been the nicest of humans and, to be fair, I haven't been the nicest human to my roommate who has shared so much about communication with me, one would think I would have picked up a few things and use it but...Thursday. So...here I go again being silent because I'm not sure if I'm receiving the messages correctly. A bit of fine-tuning if you ask me. Being an observer so that I can manage myself more properly in social settings...also to just be able to navigate humans better. Goals.

 I am no better than the gentleman living on the street or the dirty politicians who rapaciously takes more than his/her share, however, I strive to do and be better than I was yesterday and today...I failed miserably. 

I apologize for being a shit heel causing you pain. I know you had good intentions and meant no harm. I love you all the same. Glad you feel better and im glad you took your time with that feeling. - To, Robin

                                          From, Oleander